


clochette

by silkwyrm



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, stuck in rarepair hell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 16:59:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7900669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silkwyrm/pseuds/silkwyrm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Suzu, the person she loves, and how one year is far too short.</p>
            </blockquote>





	clochette

**Author's Note:**

> this pairing deserves better than my writing tbh but i tried

 

Suzu Kuromori regrets a lot of things, but letting Anzu go was the worst mistake she’s made.

When they had first met, she’d thought that Anzu was just talking to her to tease her, talking to her to make fun of her, but she kept coming back day after day, not even caring about Suzu ignoring her.

Over time, she’d started to want to talk with her, want to be with her, started to love the girl who didn’t leave her (the only person who had ever said her eyes were beautiful, the first friend she had, the only person who had reached out to her during that lonely first year and made it the best memories she’d ever had)

She would’ve done anything for Anzu, but she knows (should’ve known) that Anzu would never be the one to ask.

It hadn’t mattered, back then. She had thought they’d be together for the rest of their school life, and maybe even after that.   
She’d thought that there would be time to say a lot of things later.

She’d even thought of something like confessing to Anzu as a third year, telling her how much she loved her the day before graduation, telling her how much she wanted to stay together.

Anzu had transferred out at the beginning of their second year.

Suzu regrets so much, and she remembers so much (the way Anzu was always so small but always wanting to work- she’d said to Suzu once, that it felt strange for her not to be working, for her to not be doing something, that it was easier for her not to think about things when she was working)

Suzu remembers the way she looked when she was half-asleep, eyes half-closed, trying so hard not to fall asleep (the way she looked when she had fallen asleep in Suzu’s lap, soft hair framing her face, breathing softly)

(she wanted to kiss anzu then, and she wanted to stay like that forever, and of course it had ended too soon)

She remembers the way Anzu had been so quiet, too, but how it was easy to tell how she felt if you just looked (the way that, even though she would never say anything, it was so easy to tell when she liked something, when she hated something, when she wanted to leave but couldn’t say it)

So many people didn’t look.

Anzu had thanked her for that, too. She’d thanked Suzu when she had asked if she really wanted to do something, for giving her the opportunity to say no, even if she wouldn’t have taken it.

Only later, she realizes why it was so important to her, that even though she helped people because she wanted to, because she liked to, because there was nothing else to do--   
Someone giving her the option to back out was important to her because so few people did, so few people even considered that sometimes she really was pushing herself too hard.

Suzu’s helped so many people, tried to love them, to do the same thing as Anzu did for her, trying to carry on her legacy, and in doing so, she’s realized what kind of a person Anzu was.

Anzu really was her angel, really still is, but--

Oh, Anzu, she thinks again. _ I’m so sorry I didn’t understand then, I’m so sorry. _

(where are you now, she thinks. who are you with? are you with people who love you, who could help you in the ways i couldn’t, are you happy? or are you with people who just keep taking and taking, who force you to take on everything because they know you will? i hope you’re okay

_ i miss you, anzu. _ )

A year passes.

She meets someone with eyes like hers in an out-of the way cafe that she’s started performing at.

They strike up a friendship, and when he wonders if they’re siblings she half-believes it, hearing his story.

When she hears him say it, say that he’d go anywhere for that person who reached out to him, do anything to help him--she almost envies him, envies their relationship (envies that they’re together, that he can still  _ do that _ )

She knows, though, that they are not Valkyrie, and Anzu is not Shu, and Anzu is someone who would never let herself be taken care of like that.

She doesn’t want for her and Anzu to swap places with them, not really.

(but maybe, if she’d been able to say it just once, that she’d do anything for her--)

(maybe it would’ve worked. maybe they could’ve been together on that stage again

maybe they could’ve been together)

One day, she’s sitting in that same cafe, and a hand taps her shoulder.

It feels familiar, but she doesn’t know--doesn’t want to think about who it might be--and then she turns around.

Anzu looks the same, a little bit more tired, maybe, and seeing her--

All the things Suzu’s wanted to say die out into a single blur of “i miss you, i love you, i’m sorry--i”

She doesn’t know what to say, she can’t say anything, she wants to run but doesn’t want to lose her again--

She doesn’t know how much of what she’s thinking she’s actually said out loud, how much she’s just thought, but it must’ve been something--must’ve been a lot of it, because Anzu’s looking at her with an expression on her face she can’t quite place (and suzu is scared, scared she’s ruined it, scared she’s done something to mess it up, just scared--)

And then Anzu smiles that same familiar soft smile of hers, and takes Suzu’s hand

It’s quiet, because Anzu’s voice has always been quiet, but, she hears it.

( _ i missed you too, i love you, thank you _ )

Neither of them say anything else, they just sit there for a while, Anzu’s head on Suzu’s shoulder.

In the end, when Anzu finally has to go, Suzu finally, finally asks if she can come, if she can help, because she won’t let Anzu leave alone, not anymore.

Anzu smiles, and together they start on the long walk back.


End file.
